In reviewing the land at the barn, I continuously was drawn to looking at the spot in front of the barn. Every time I have been there, it has been mud. Dark brown to black, kicked up in hills and craters, sometimes sopping with puddles, others drier but still moist, MUD!
As I stood there quietly observing with a thoughtful look on my face, Lisa came up and started talking with me. I mentioned the mud. She said it would be better once they get grass planted. I looked at the land again.
"You're not going to get grass to grow there."
Dumb look.
"You're not. That's why it's mud. That's why it's always been mud. The land slopes down here, this is a low spot. Water drains down to it. The barn is right there, it blocks the sun half the day. Shade. Shade in a low spot equals mud. You need to plant something that likes shade and will set up a nice root system that will soak up some water and dry out the soil. Then you can get stuff to grow."
"Good. That'll be your job."
Yay. Resident Scientist. Biologist. Botanist. Lisa suggested "Resident Nerd." I vetoed it.
She bought a composition kit. Off I went. I threw on my cheapy $4 bright purple ("Holy Cow are those some purple boots!" purple) plastic boots and did my best impression of a WWE female wrestler climbing through the ropes. Ok, really it was horrible. They make it look graceful. I make it look more like back up to the rope, turn, swing one leg through, duck and under, get the other leg through before you get zapped and don't fall into the horse or a pile of poop! I got through with only a mild speed bump into Sheldon - nosey little git that he is.
Tromp, tromp, tromp, SCHLUCK! Weight back into boot. Change weight. SCHLURP! Ok. Weight back into boot. Go slower. I sent up a prayer. "Please God let my boot come out of that muck with my foot!" It was like walking through 3 inches of guano. Wet, black, mud that you logically know isn't exactly "mud" at all. It's rather an organic mix of soil and natural fertilizer.
I found a good spot. I squatted down and began troweling away the top three inches of gook. Found the "dirt." Sample collected. As I was collecting, I felt a tickly sensation on my back left pants pocket. I swatted my hand back and encountered a horse nose. "Sheldon! Stop it!"
Tromp, tromp, tromp. Next site. Squat down, scrape away, find dirt, tickly sensation, tug. Great. Darn horse is now grabbing the button on my pants pocket and pulling it. "SHELDON! Stop biting my butt!" This went on for 3 more sample sites. Sheldon followed to each one. Sheldon sampled my pants at each one as well. Then he sampled my hair when I stood back up and went to walk out of the field.
The pH test was quick. 6.0-6.5. Right where we wanted it. The rest of the testing had to settle and wait for the next day. Nitrogen was totally depleted. Phosphate was ok, and Potash had a surplus. This led me to wonder about our "fertilizer." So I tested that, too. Yes. I tested the horse poop. Results were much like the soil tests. Good to know. That tells us we need to add nitrogen to the ground in order to get any grass to grow, our own personal blend of "fertilizer" is inadequate for start-up.
On a side note, I overheard Lisa talking to JJ at bedtime one night this week. The JJ quote of the week: "But I don't know how to think." And on that, I wish you all a great day! Thanks for reading!
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