Healing Room

So much has changed in my life over the past weeks, months, and years. A few months ago had you told me I'd be in an evangelical Christian church singing and swaying to Christian Rock, I'd have told you no way! Not for me! Glad someone finds peace with it, but that's not me.


On Monday night, December 7th, I sat in a room on the upper level of the school side of the church. My best friend and her son were in a seat across from me. Between us and in circle with us sat three members of the church. They prayed for her son. They prayed in Jesus' name. They prayed for his perfect brain and his perfect little body to continue to make strides and be well, and to overcome autism. They thanked God for putting compassionate, loving people in his path. They thanked God and Jesus for my best friend and prayed for her continued strength.

I got teary eyed. The energy raised was palpable. I could feel it. It was tingly and moving. Some may say that sounds crazy.

The three "healers" in this room did not think me crazy at all. The eldest smiled and said I was very perceptive and sensitive. The blonde lady next to me informed me I was feeling the Holy Spirit. She described it as a "warmth" that comes over her. The eldest said this was not like New Age circles, but it seems very similar to me.

The three laid hands on my spine and prayed in Jesus' name for healing. They prayed the vertebra would be aligned and any spurs or disc material not where it was supposed to be would be corrected. They prayed for the nerves to be well. They prayed for the Devil to leave this body and not come back! They prayed for the mass on my liver to vanish, for the roots to shrivel and it to leave! They commanded these things, the eldest in a foreign tongue I did not understand.

As proof, I ran through the room with the eldest healer. I jumped up and down with her. My back did not hurt when I did it. I smiled. I thanked her. She told me, "No, Thank Jesus. I didn't do anything. Jesus did the healing." They hugged me and gave me reading material on how to keep the healing and scriptures to review.

A month ago I may have been receptive. Two months ago I'd have thought of the kitten picture. I still think of the kitten picture...but my smile is for a different reason now :-)

Sigh

As I sit here and write this, there's seemingly a million other things I SHOULD be doing instead. I should be making phone calls. I should be getting dressed. I should be reaching out and touching base with my Aunt and my Grandmother and my Father. I should be calling legal services. I should be doing the dishes. I should be cleaning and packing. I should be working on Avon.

I think that's part of my problem. There's so many "I should be's" that I am overwhelmed and just not. Sigh.

I started off this morning in a similar manner as yesterday - lying in bed procrastinating getting up until the urge to go to the bathroom was strong enough I could ignore it no longer. Then I made coffee. I began writing my "To Do" list. I took a break at 10:30 to watch Joyce Meyer. I always feel better after watching. I notice I feel better after going to church too. B noticed it. He told me on Monday I always look like I feel better afterward.

Heh, during Joyce's show on Monday she said, "The word of God renews your mind and teaches you how to think correctly." Guess I was hitting the nail on the head when I said I felt "rejuvenated." See? I'm not crazy. (And if I am a bunch of other people are right there with me!)

Joyce's sermons have been focusing on depression this week - very pertinent topic for me right now. After Joyce, I started looking up vocabulary I have been meaning to get around to for two weeks. Things have been busy, to say the least.

D's dad called me to update me on D. She's missed school all week, but seems to be making progress since the medication change on Wednesday.

When we saw the doctor on Wednesday, we came away with a new understanding of D having a form of separation anxiety that makes it difficult for her to get to school at times. This was a new revelation, but makes perfect sense. Her symptoms really started in full force when she came home and I was in the hospital in January of 2008. She didn't want me working. She didn't want me at doctor's all the time. She didn't want to leave the house. There were times she didn't want to go to her dad's over the weekend. There was a time prior to this when she was in 5th grade that she had similar issues, but not to this extent.

Now, she's asking for homeschooling with me as her teacher. I tried to explain to her that she has so many more opportunities being in the brick and mortar school. The teachers know more, they have more resources, the opportunity to socialize and make friends, the opportunity to be part of plays and teams...she wasn't convinced. She told the doctor she likes the school. She is just having trouble getting there.

Tomorrow she's getting her hair cut and a manicure with her Grandmother up there. Then they're going to stop at the outlets for her to do some Christmas shopping. Then she'll be home. Maybe she'll come back to church with me on Sunday so we have some more time together. I doubt it, but maybe. She came with me last week but looked uncomfortable, she said she didn't want to be there. She said she was going so maybe I'll stop telling her about it. I appreciate that. She did say she'd go to the January 10th taping of the CD.

There's a bunch more I could write in here, but I'm gonna stop for now so I can maybe get a few things checked off this To Do list. Sigh. Here goes nothing!

Food for Thought

Yesterday was the Angel Food pick up at the church. B and I have been getting Angel Food for a year and a half now. Aunt M heard about it and bought us a few boxes and it's been a regular event since June 2008. It's been the majority of my food budget. It's kept a variety of foods in my house, somethings I would not splurge on, other things I never would have thought to try because they weren't on the list of "staples" I usually work with. A few months we didn't have money for angel food. My Angel of an Aunt got us a box for October.

When B and I showed up for pick up, Bill's face lit up! Bill is a man who usually works the parking lot during the angel food pick up. He has been very kind over the past year we have been going to this church for food. Last January he encouraged me to sit in the car while B got the food. In February, pick up was a week after my liver biopsy. He again encouraged me to wait in the car. I stood outside like a trooper with everyone else though. When they continued telling me it was ok to sit in the car, I told them I was "allowed to be cold, I just couldn't lift anything." A lady gave me a hug and blessed me. They got some of the church youth to help B carry the food back to the car.

In March, my back went into spasms while standing in line. Bill saw me walking back to the car and came over to walk with me and stop traffic so I wouldn't have to wait long. He then spent the rest of the time we were there periodically looking over to make sure I was ok. I have thanked God so many times for having so many angels at the food pick ups. They truly move me every month I have gone there, many times to tears.

So last month when we showed up, Bill was so happy to see us again. He feared I had gotten sick or something bad had happened. When B said it was just because of lack of funds, Bill told us he wanted to talk to us after we picked up our food. After the pickup we parked over where Bill was in the parking lot. He came over and gave us the phone number for the food pantry and the clothing shop. He told us lack of money is no reason for us not to have food. He gave us his personal phone number and encouraged us to call him if we were short this month.

B called Bill two weeks ago. He asked what I wanted. I had been looking over and thought maybe a chicken box, maybe the veggie box, definitely the signature box. I told B to just ask for the signature box. Bill seemed shocked and said, "That's it?" I said well, I was looking at the chicken box, but the signature box is enough. Bill said ok, no problem, look for him when we get there and he'll set us up.

When we got there Saturday morning, Bill gave us a receipt for a signature box, a chicken box, and a fruit and veggie box. He said, "You have to have veggies to go with your meat." I thought I was going to cry right there. Bill assured us it was nothing to be ashamed of, and he reminded me once we're on our feet, we'll be able to give back. Pay it forward. Thank God!

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For a week now A has been telling me I need to be at the church at 2pm after the Angel Food pick up. She would not tell me why. B was off picking up his kids, so A picked me up to take me back. She finally cut the suspense for me. We were showing back up for the Thanksgiving dinner Emergency Food Relief distribution. Again, I nearly cried.

Last year, A showed up at the back door with grocery bags right before Thanksgiving. There was a Turkey, stuffing, green beans, all the fixings. I did cry. I was so grateful and thankful to have such people in my life. I must have done something right for God to bless me with them.

This year, funds are tight seemingly everywhere. A said simply, "I couldn't afford two Thanksgiving dinners this year, so I got help!" God sends angels...

Arts Academy Open House

Last night was the Open House at D's High School. I can barely believe my baby's in High School already! It looks like a fabulous place. They look like they are really trying to make it fantastic. They're offering chorus, instrumental music, dance, art, graphics, creative writing and all of the regular academics.

The building is old fashioned architecturally. You enter into a foyer that presents a wide central staircase to a landing. Two sets of stairs lead you on the outside of the first stair up to another landing just under the second floor. From that landing, you go up a few steps to the second floor and are deposited just outside the large auditorium where we began our evening.

The auditorium is grand. There are several sections of seating before a large stage. There is a balcony section of seating as well. D and I took our seats and I sent a text message to her dad to let him know where to look for us. The principal called the evening to order. Then the chorus sang. One of the Choral students stepped forward and a boy sat at the piano. The two performed a song the singer wrote. She had a lovely voice.

We then picked up D's schedule and proceeded through her day, from one class to the next to the next, up and down four floors of stairs! My legs had such a work out! You definitely don't need a Gym membership if you work or attend classes there!

She begins with English Honors. Her History teacher made mention to us that D tends to finish her work early and he is recommending her for Honors next year. Her math teacher also has encouraged her to go Honors, but he feels she should be in the Lower Academy. The Lower Academy is Elizabeth's academy for gifted and talented students.

The experience was somewhat bittersweet. I am so happy she had worked herself into a little niche where she feels confident and belongs. I am happy she is realizing her potential again. I am happy she likes the school.   I am saddened that it means she'll live away from me for the next four years. I knew she would not be with me forever, but I thought I had these years before college with her full time.

Grace and Peace

This morning I went to the church we have been picking up the Angel Food at with my friend A. We sat with her Grandmother and Aunt. It was a different experience. The room is an octagonal dome. They have a stage on one side, chairs set up on the others, and a balcony with seating as well. A had told me the first hour was singing, but I was not expecting a keyboardist, a drummer with a full drum set, a guitar player, a bassist and 5 backup singers!

I was expecting hymn-type singing and wooden pews and an altar. Church. Right? Not here! There were no rear-numbing wooden anythings. There was no organ. There was no altar or candles.

There was a huge TV screen they had the lyrics to the songs running on. It was like Christian Rock 'N Roll Karaoke hour. There were microphones, and music stands. The Pastor had a little over the ear headset microphone so there was no excuse for not hearing him. The cameraman followed him well, so there was no excuse for not being able to see. They posted the scripture on the projector, too, so there was no excuse as not knowing where we are or what we're talking about.

Honestly, you won't need half of it. The music was lively and moving. The Pastor was skilled in keeping you awake. He was energetic and engaging. He preached his sermon as though lecturing a group of college students, pacing back and forth, asking questions and expecting responses. If he didn't get a response, he would stop, put his hand to his ear, and say, "Hello?" Obediently, someone would shout, "Amen!" Pastor Walt would kindly reply, "Thank you, Jesus."

He began discussing current issues, and related Bible teaching to today's events. He discussed most of America being in bondage and "stuck in Egypt," because we are a society in debt. He discussed how we need to "move ourselves out of Egypt." I have never heard a Pastor talk about credit cards and interest rates before. This man was able to stand up there and discuss credit cards and pour out what the Bible says and how it relates...and he made it make sense!

In all honestly, currently I can not recall all of what he spoke about. I know he was running through the book of Acts. He would call out the chapter and verse, and then read it, and discuss it as it pertained in the Bible, and how it pertains to today.

When I was younger, I remember going to Sunday School at the Lutheran Church. I remember sitting in the room with all the other children my age. I remember singing "This Little Light of Mine," and "He's Got the Whole World in His Hand." I remember making a "me-sized" picture of myself. I remember being a shepherd in the Christmas play. I remember a new Pastor who came in while I was in Elementary or Middle School who did a Mystery interactive youth group kind of thing. I remember making Christmas tree ornaments, and a "Christmas Tree" out of a Reader's Digest magazine. I remember a bunch of crazy, undisciplined kids running around and a poor woman standing in the front trying to control them and not succeeding. I remember going to Catholic Church with Grandma and Grandpa. I remember getting palms there. I remember not understanding any of it! I liked the songs and the stained glass windows. I remember feeling like I didn't quite belong there, and wanting to. I remember asking questions and not understanding the answers, or not getting answers at all.

Over the years, I have explored several paths. I have on some level looked into the paths of Jews, Buddhists, Hindus, Wiccans, Druids, Asatru and a few others. Maybe my exploration is coming full circle. I seem to be back where I started, but my eyes are seeing a different light. I don't know that I consider any of them "more right" than any other, but maybe more "right now" is a good way to put it. I firmly believe all Gods are One, and all Goddesses are One (for those who believe in a female deity). I believe as we don't all speak and understand English, or Spanish, or French, God does not speak to us all the same. God speaks to us in ways we will understand the messages. As humans, we're not always receptive to everything coming in. Some days we don't hear what we should. Some days we prefer blue, some days we prefer green. I think this is how I'm being spoken to most loudly, and hearing, right now. A and I are going back next week.

Why doesn't anyone listen to me?

Wow, it's been a while since I've been in here! Sorry about that for anyone who's actually been reading this thing. There's never any comments, so I am never really sure.

Anyways, since the last posting, it's been 2 weeks or more, so a decent amount has happened! Firstly, I had another decent bout of chest pain. I worried I was having a heart attack. Since I really can't afford another ER bill, I waited til the next day and called the clinic, saw the doc the next day, she didn't seem horribly worried. They never do. I went for another Echocardiogram, an EKG and a Pulmonary Function Test, and she prescribed an inhaler. As Adria says, "They still haven't figured out what that is yet? It's been at least two years you have periodic chest pain!" No idea. No one knows. I'm an enigma. Of course at this visit, I totally forgot to get my urinalysis results, so who knows on that too, but I'm hoping they were fine and that's why no one said anything. Next appointment I'll figure it out. I'll make a list. I'm good with them. I nearly have Alzheimer's without them some days.

Dayna's had 2 therapy appointments and a doctor's appointment. The first appointment she was up nearly 2 days straight and refused to get out of the car again. She hasn't done that in a while. She likes this therapist. Since she's been stable on her meds she hasn't done this. Back in June, her father and the doc decided to decrease her meds because they didn't know what they were doing for her. Hello! THIS is what they do for her...they prevent these things...the up for 2 days, the sudden flip from chatty happy to utter refusal to speak or move. The therapist came downstairs and sat at the car and did therapy there. I don't know what she said to her, but Dayna perked up. When we saw the doc I reviewed everything, all her behaviors, the doc looked at her father and said, "I guess the meds DO do something for her." I sat there wondering why no one ever listens to me...I am speaking English, aren't I? So long story short, her dose increased again - not all the way up, I told the doc I was not upping it that much that fast because she is very sensitive to it. When she started this med at half this dose she was sedated for 6 days! They just screwed her up weaning her off it, I was not going to torture her slamming her back up so fast!

The following week she had an outburst on Monday where she froze up before singing in front of people, then flipped into a crying spell curled into the fetal position. She screamed at me that I needed to kick everyone out of the house. I refused. She put on her shoes and headed to the lake. I told her I'll come. She said no. I went anyway, followed 5 minutes behind her and sat two benches away. When she has her friend with her, I have no problem with the girls going to the lake. It's right across the street. If there weren't so many trees in my neighbors lot, I could see it from my window. But I don't like her going alone. She has social anxiety issues sometimes and avoids people. I don't know who's at the lake, if there's any riff raff...she just wasn't in the right state of mind to deal with that.

She told me to go home. I said no, I'm tired, my back hurts, I'm gonna sit here and rest and stare at the water and the ducks. I then shooed her off and told her to go sit on her bench, this one's mine. She made a weird face while trying to make sense out of that and promptly sat down on my bench with me. After a few minutes of me talking about the ducks or ignoring her, she started talking and we walked back home. Within a half hour she was hanging out in the living room like nothing happened. Two days later she had a lovely therapy session, all better!

This past weekend she's been in Salem, Massachusetts with her dad. Dayna decided for "vacation" she wanted to go where they had the witch trials. I haven't seen her since they came back yesterday, but all the text messages make it seem like she had a great time. I don't know if she made it to the spiritual store I gave her the address for. I thought maybe she could find some nice candles or gems or something. I'm sure she'll surprise me with something tomorrow when she comes home! I miss her.

edited 8/28 - I got a hug. My daughter came back from Salem and gave me a hug. She brought me something from Seattle, escapes me what it was right now, but I KNOW she got me something, she got B a golf ball. From Salem - I get a hug! :-)

Camp Premier

Friday, July 31st was Dayna's theater camp production. Her dad called Thursday to verify I was taking her home after it. He also offered that she can stay home until Wednesday when she has her doctor's appointment in Westfield...to make it easier for me...less driving, less gas, less tolls. Uh huh. In the six weeks Dayna has been out of school, she has been HERE 4 of them. Her dad's only request was if Dayna wanted to go back to his house on Sunday, that I call him as soon as I knew because he was going to a concert or something and needed to know to come home early. He also told me Dayna has asked him NOT to go to the theater production, so he was going to work on Friday.

Thursday night I text messaged Dayna's best friend, M, to ask her if she could go. She's in SC visiting her Grandma. So then I text messaged Dayna to ask if she minded if I brought B with me. Dayna said that was fine, B can come. (Hmmm...She tells her dad NOT to come, but says B CAN come...anyone else seeing this? She had this same request on her Graduation. She told her dad she didn't want him there, but called me to ask if B was coming.)

Friday B and I drove up to Kean University. All her dad told me was that it's in the little theater. There's nothing marked on the map of the campus denoting where the little theater is. I stopped a Security guy and asked him for directions. Right on the outside of the Student Center is a sign that says, "Little Theater." Ah...so it's the Little Theater, as in that's it's NAME! It's not the little theater, as in an adjective, like I'd thought!

The production began with a collaborative piece all of the kids wrote and performed. Since it was a "work in progress" and they'd only been working on it two days, they all had scripts on stage with them. I believe this camp group was 4th grade through 8th grade. It was a slight mishmosh of little skits. It was cute.

Then, all of the kids sat in the front row of the audience. The actors who ran the camp, and the college interns who helped, performed a short play written by each student. Some of them were really good. Some of them were just ok. Dayna's play was entitled The Black Rose. Her play starts in Part 4 at 5:00 minutes into the following video, and continues in the beginning of Part 5.




In case you have trouble viewing the videos, here is a summary:
It was about a girl named Lydia who comes across an old woman in the forest. The woman lets the girl pick a flower out of her basket. She picks a Black Rose. The woman tries to tell the girl the legend behind the flower, but the girl has no time for silly tales from an old woman! The woman calls to the girl, "Your greatest wish will come true as the last petal falls!" The girl continues on and finds a girl talking to a fish! The girl tells Lydia the old woman trades her butter and bread for the flowers from her garden, but she's never seen the black rose before.

Lydia takes the rose home and places it in a vase. Her father comes home. Lydia talks to her father, he doesn't respond. He doesn't appear to notice she exists. Lydia walks to the flower and strokes a petal while talking to her father. The petal falls. More petals fall. Lydia cries out, "Oh, no! My flower!"

Lydia's father speaks! He asks why the flower was so important, they can get another flower. Lydia hugs him! He asks why. She states that he hasn't talked in years! He explains he talks, just not at home, it's too sad, Lydia reminds him of her mother. Lydia exclaims it must be the flowers magic!

At the end of the plays, the camp director gave out awards to each kid. Each one had something special written about their time at camp and their strengths. The certificate says that Dayna has completed Premiere Stages Camp Premiere 2009 as a Playwright with the Professional Actors Equity Theatre at Kean University. They identified her strengths as the ability to write serious plays and humorous works. The Producing Associate, Erica, said she has "no doubt we'll be reading Dayna's published works any day now!"

After the awards were handed out, they had a small refreshments table set up in the next room. While we were there, Erica and I started talking. She told me there is a playwrights competition of sorts every year at Kean. She is going to email us in November when they begin accepting submissions. They have an awards ceremony in May where they pick the winners. She said Dayna's works are definitely up to par and has encouraged her to submit a play for consideration.

Crazy For Ever and Fresco Blue

One of B's friends, S, sent us an email a few days ago to invite us to the Meadowlands Racetrack on Saturday. He said a band we really like, named Undisputed, was playing. Since we haven't seen S and his girlfriend, M, since February, and we really like Undisputed, and it was only a buck to get in, we went! I'm trying desperately to "have a life" right now. I think it's good for my mental health. All of this hurting and trouble moving around and stressing out over medical stuff and bills is weighing me down lately. I need to remind myself what the point in breathing is sometimes.

We left a bit later than we wanted, again, my fault. I haven't quite gotten the hang of it taking me twice as long to get out the door yet. On the way up, I tried snapping a picture of the NYC skyline while driving down the NJ Turnpike. The one to the right came out the best, despite it being so far away. I tried to zoom it a bit...didn't save right. :( It's still not the same without the towers, but you can maybe make out the Empire State Building in that shot.

We got to the racetrack and after minimal confusion, found our way in. This was my first time at the Meadowlands near the actual track. I have never seen a horse race before, unless you count the Belmont commercials on TV. The sound of the band led the way for us! Just follow the music!

We found our friends quickly and watched the show! It's been quite a while since we've seen Undisputed. They never cease to entertain. They play a good diversity of current music, a few classics, and they have good stage presence. Last year on my birthday, they played our favorite local bar/grill, High Velocity. During the show, one of the strings on the guitar broke. The musician, they call him "Gonzo," began fixing the string mid-song, came in for the solo with a string missing, and then finished fixing the string and jumped back in. We were thoroughly impressed.

I was amazed at how "family oriented" the track is. There were kids all over the place! They had a moon walk bounce house and carnival type stands (throw the bean bag to knock over the thingy, basketball hoops, etc). There were kids tossing a football, kids dancing in front of the stage, two little girls doing cartwheels and back hand springs - they were amazing! Those girls couldn't have been more than 7 years old.

Since S had never bet before, B walked him over to place his first ever bet. Our time there got more exciting after that. It's much more fun to watch the race when you're rooting for someone. By the 11th race, B put $2.00 on Crazy For Ever to win. He was a bit of a long shot, 10-1 odds, and guess what? Crazy For Ever came in 1st! B won back all the money we'd spent there so far! At that point I started trying to figure out how to read the program. I looked at B and said, "Put $2.00 on Fresco Blue to Show." The odds were 8-1, the commentary in the program said he's not the favorite, usually doesn't pull out first, but he shows up a lot. So I figured well, betting Show he can come in 1st, 2nd, or 3rd and I'll still win something. The name caught my eye, the stats didn't turn me off, so we put $2 on #7 Fresco Blue.

We watched the next race intently. We watched #7 appear in first place half the race. Then he held second place through most of the rest. The we watched #7 fall into 4th. I half-pouted and said, "Well, for my first time betting, it was fun!" We walked back to where M was sitting with two of her friends. We said we were going to get going since the races were over. M said, "Didn't you bet on Race 13?" We said yeah, we all lost. She said they hadn't done race 13 yet. Huh? Apparently, we were watching race 12. Duh!

If that's not funny enough for you, let me add on. After we all thought we lost, S threw his ticket away. Now, after finding out that the race he bet on hadn't happened yet, he went searching the garbage can's for it. M and I stood back and let the boys enjoy their "dumpster diving" session. I was so glad I kept mine to scrapbook. I thought I was gonna scrapbook a "loser" as a momento. I have a literal second chance!

Race 13 got underway. Fresco Blue was riding 3rd place after the first quarter. By the half mark, our #7 was in second! Go Fresco Blue! At the 3/4 mark, Fresco Blue had taken 1st position! Along the final stretch it was neck and neck between four horses. The commentator was running away with who was where to the point we could barely keep up! Then, the race was over. We waited for the announcement of who the winner was...and waited...and waited. Then, "In first, it's Fresco Blue!" WooHoo! My first on a whim horse race bet and I won 1st place!

Then I realized why it doesn't pay to play it safe and bet "Show." At least not for $2.00, anyway. I cashed out at the window and was handed $2.40. My horsey came in first place and I won a whomping 40 cents. What a bummer! Hehe, I'll come back and try again next time I have $2 to spare. Ya never know...I might get lucky!

Attack of the Raspberry?

Two weeks ago Dayna talked me into letting her dye her hair. Her father said it was okay when she asked him. Have you ever taken two 14 year old girls to buy hair dye? I have to give them credit...these kids were rather good about it all.

Dayna and her best friend, Maddi, narrowed their picks to three shades and Dayna came to me to help her choose the winner. She had medium ash blonde, medium golden blonde, and dark natural blonde. I talked her into the darker shade because I have seen and heard the horror stories of trying to go too light on the first shot...carrot tops! The LAST thing I needed was a 14 year old who already has self-confidence issues at times refusing to leave the house because she's got orange hair. I figured dark blonde was safer. (In the end it was, but there were bumps along the road getting there.)

If you've ever read a box of hair dye, you've seen the awful warnings they put on those boxes. You'd wonder why on Earth they let this stuff be sold over the counter. "May cause serious allergic reaction that may be fatal." "If product contacts eyes, may cause blindness." Huh?!?!?!? Now I'm glad I don't dye my hair...what did I get myself into telling her this is okay? Well, millions of people do it, so here we go! Directions read, allergy test explained, temper tantrum ensued! The following day and a half all I heard was, "Can me and Maddi dye my hair now? Why not? Maddi's never had a reaction! Why do I have to do that? Can I just do it for an hour? Okay, overnight but I want to dye it tomorrow!"

Allergy skin test complete, no reactions, a whole lot of, "I told you I'd be fine"'s and an ecstatic teenager later we sat at the kitchen table to commence Operation Dye Dayna's Hair. About a quarter of the way into it, I realize, her hair comes to her butt...I should have bought two boxes. Live and Learn. I actually had enough in the one bottle, but next time we're definitely buying two so we can saturate it better. Once the stuff is in her hair, I realize I need to figure out how to rinse this kid's head. I threw some towels in the bathroom and figured I'll stand in the tub while she leans over the side, and I'll hose her down with the shower head.

While rinsing her head, I realized I was having a bit of trouble bending over her. The shower head wasn't overly cooperative, the hose was shorter than I'd have liked. About halfway through, I sprayed myself in the face. All I could think was, "Oh no! Did that spray me directly from the shower head or was that a ricochet off her head with dye in it?" I finished rinsing her head praying it was not hair dye in my eye - especially after reading the side of the box. Ugh! I wrapped Dayna's head in a towel, jumped out of the shower (at this point, soaked from the knee down) and rinsed my eyes out. Then I got her head back in the shower for the conditioner.

By this time, it's 11:30pm. Her head is done, wrapped in a towel, she's got that from here. I'm left cleaning up, and over-reacting to my eye incident. Who do you call at 11:30 at night for a hair dye question? Kathy dyes her hair...she works nights...her husband Chris is usually up...text message off! Kathy's working. Chris assures me I'll be fine and won't go blind, but knows I'm overanalyzing so calls around to find someone who dyes their hair regularly to get me some advice. Word comes back that it would have hurt worse, and I'll be fine. I state, "But it's still bugging me!" Chris insists it's because I "blasted my eye with a bottle of saline." I deny it, I didn't "blast" my eye, I "flushed it." To this he responds, "I know you, and my mother was a nurse, face it. You blasted your eye."

By 2am I'm still bugged by this. I'm checking the websites of the local hospitals to see if one of them happens to have telephone triage so I can call and just have a medical professional tell me I'm fine. I don't want to go to the ER for something stupid, but I don't want to be blind tomorrow morning either. No luck finding a number...don't these places do this stuff? They should! Ah! Poison Control is 24 hours! I grabbed the phone. According to the "Poison Specialist" (what does one have to do to become a "poison specialist"? Is that a specific course you can take in school? What are the prerequisites? Who else thinks of this stuff?) it would have hurt a lot worse than I described had I actually gotten the dye in my eye, and since it was just a box of regular over the counter hair dye and not a chemical relaxer, I didn't have much to worry about, but if I still couldn't sleep, they would be there all night and I was free to call back for reassurance if I needed to. Now I could go to sleep.

The following morning, Dayna informed me that she felt like her head had been attacked by a raspberry. She was not the dark natural blonde the box professed she'd be, but a slightly lighter brown with all of her natural red highlights brought to the surface! I thought it looked nice. I know it was not the color she was aiming for. And so I called mom and asked her to set up a hair appointment for us so the beautician could see how her hair turned out and let us know the best course to take to get it near the color Dayna wanted...but that story's for another blog :-)

And now you can all laugh at me as much as everyone else who knows about this for needing to call Poison Control over something "stupid," but I got to sleep after that phone call, so it was worth it! I'm glad they're there!

The Nerdly Pre-Sale

So today as I was reading through the newspaper, I came across the circular for Kmart. I don't do much shopping, I don't have the money to, but when there are things I have been needing and they happen to be on great sales, I take that as a sign that I'm supposed to go get it now before it's regular price again. Yesterday while I was reading the paper I saw an article about the Freehold Free Concert and Movie in the park. The band they had playing happened to be the Nerds, a band I have followed since before Dayna was born. I thought hey great, we'll hit Kmart, then go see the Nerds play, and they're having fireworks! I missed out on fireworks 4th of July because of all the tourists at Seaside we couldn't get into town TO see them. I thought this would be a great way to spend time with Dayna while she's home, the park thing is free, how can you beat that? Boy, was I wrong and shows how much I know!

Dayna actually got dressed without much fuss...6 outfits later, but she was dressed and willing, and out the door we went! Turns out, she did NOT want to go to the park thing, she was only going because she thought we might be able to pick up her friend Kristin to go shopping with. No Kristin. Family time. That deflated the good mood. Kmart went okay. No major problems, goofed a bit, got a bit, all good.

As we're walking around Kmart I realize, none of what I saw in the circular is tagged as on sale. We saw a price check machine on one of the poles and I had Bret scan an item...$34.99...the circular said it was on sale for $19.99? I proceeded to the front of the store to see if they had a display of circulars. They did! Last weeks! Ugh! So I stopped at the customer service desk to ask. The girl was very nice and promptly asked me, "Did you get the circular out of yesterday or today's paper?" I replied that I had gotten it out of yesterday's paper. "That sale starts tomorrow." Ugh! Dopey me! Luckily, I remembered from my old Sears days that we used to do "Sales Adjusts," where customers who recently purchased an item that has now gone on sale can come in with their receipt and get credited the refund to the sale price. They still do it! Yay for us! We bought the stuff since we were there, and I'll go back on Monday and get the refund. If my calculations are correct, I think I've potentially saved us about $75. I love getting those "You saved..." receipts! I'm such a dork. I need a life.

So after Kmart we headed off to Michael J. Tighe Park in Freehold for the free concert and movie in the park thing. You could tell it was free admission. We were parked in the boonies in the WAY back of the park, not even in the lot, but in the auxiliary grass section that's usually blocked off. Needless to say, we had a good walk. Of course by this point we were all ready for the restrooms. After standing in an obnoxiously long line, Dayna and I emerge to find Bret playing Guitar Hero at one of the stands. Dayna did not want to wait around for him to finish. The band was doing a sound check. Dayna and I walked over near the stage and I chose a spot I could see the band and if I looked over, could see Bret's head! Perfect!

After 2 songs I couldn't see Bret's head anymore. I walked back towards the restroom to find him wandering in and out looking around for us. He was totally oblivious to us walking right past him before and had no idea where we were, thought we were still in the bathroom line. Once we got back to where I left Dayna, I asked her where she wanted to sit/stand. She gave me a look and said, "I don't want to be here." So I asked her what she'd like to eat, they had a pizza stand, sausage/peppers/onions, london broil sandwiches, hot dogs, hamburgers... She's no longer hungry. Wonderful. Here we go again...the Crankies!

Considering her schedule has been screwed up this past week or so, I went really (really) easy on her. She's flipped her schedule enough so that she's waking up between 3-5am and falling asleep late afternoon, early evening. This is part of why I wanted to get her out of the house today. I had the plan that if I could get her out, I could keep her awake until a normal bedtime, and *maybe* we can flip her back to a normal schedule. I always forget this plan never comes without at least one episode of the Crankies (and yes, I meant to capitalize that. If you've seen my kid cranky, you know why). I'm not sure if it's just "school's out for the summer syndrome," if it's just she's happy to be here and not at her dad's, or if it might have something to do with the medication schedule change (that I did not like the idea of to begin with). I'm sure when she goes back to her father's she'll be "Fine. We have no problems with her. Everything's good." Some days I think they're delusional...and if they're not I'm incredibly overprotective and paranoid.

Anyways, to prevent a huge scene, we started walking back to the car. I stopped to take a few pictures, just to prove I was there. I need something to scrapbook.


Did I mention the event was sponsored by the Veteran's Alliance? Hence the American flags being waved in the picture. They were doing 50/50's and taking donations for a Marine who came back from Iraq paralyzed. I always like to show support for those things.

On the way back to the car, and once we were back and IN the car, I asked Dayna numerous times where she wanted to go to eat. Silent treatment. I hate that. I find it incredibly rude. So I asked for the hundred millionth time, and get a grunt in response. Which I might hate more than the silent treatment, the jury's still out on that one, I haven't fully decided...I *might* prefer the grunts because at least then my existence is acknowledged. After several minutes of sitting there waiting for some sort of English response, and watching people walk by with their dogs on leashes, and noticing the cats in the grass, Dayna tells me, "I sent you a text message!"

My cell phone has a mind of it's own lately. It has a habit of spontaneously turning itself off. The Sprint store has told me there's been "issues" with this phone (LG Rumor) and they were doing buy-backs for a while. I just might go do that. At the time the tech tried uploading an upgrade package onto the phone and a battery prong cleaning was also suggested to see if it helped. It does it about half as often now. Of course, it's done it again! So I have to turn the phone on and wait for this text message to come through because my darling daughter has decided she is not speaking...despite Bret and I telling her we don't have ESP or telepathy powers yet. After several deep breaths and realizing I have been blessed finding a man with near the patience of a saint, finally the Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep! She doesn't care where we go or what we do and she's not hungry anymore. We waited ten minutes for that?!?!?!?

Several times during the 45 minute drive home, we asked what she wanted for dinner. She reiterated numerous times that she wasn't hungry, she didn't care. Bret asked her if she was awake enough for the China Buffet she loves, she refused to answer him, I asked, no answer, he said again, "Do you want sushi tonight?" Sushi is her FAVORITE. Ugh! She yelled back that she didn't care! Fine, we hit White Castle. Once there, she hollered up to us that we were wasting our money, she wasn't going to eat it, last time she got a stomach ache from this place. I told her fine, then don't eat, you're not hungry anyway. Bret reminded her that we asked her the whole ride home, gave suggestions, and she said she didn't care. She said she responded to us. I reiterated yes, you responded with "you don't care" so you should not care that this is where we chose, you heard us talking about it, you had an opportunity before we got here to veto it. The rest of the ride home was silent. Sigh.


She did end up eating, refused her meds, and posted that sign prior to putting herself to bed. At least the kid's got a sense of humor...and the kindness to consider discussing her "additude" on Tuesday. And we've reached the end of another beautiful day!

Hugs to all and hope you had a great day!